i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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