U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
only you would photoshop your dick
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
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