p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
