He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
