Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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