I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
