Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
