just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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