That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
