I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
