Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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