I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
