so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
