I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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