i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Randomize
