before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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