Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
