kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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