Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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