but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
handjob tips. give me some.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
