I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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