wake up i wanna do it froggy style
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
