distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
