Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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