i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
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