I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Randomize
