I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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