Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
