You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
there's paper in my vomit.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
