Sry I called you an 8
there was a trapeze. enough said
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize
