I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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