I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
