Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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