Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
