i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize