is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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