There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
