I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
