This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
