I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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