so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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