i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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