Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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