Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
