brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
