Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
