I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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