we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
