No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
My dad is sitting where you rode me
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
