So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
