history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
