If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
